The Upstanders Playbook: How People Are Standing Up Against Antisemitism, Racism, Bigotry, and Hate

28 experts share 140 simple, consistent habits that can profoundly impact your community.

By Yitzi Weiner

The news cycle often paints a picture of a fractured society, shadowed by division and the resurgence of age-old prejudices. In the face of such overwhelming negativity, it is easy to feel paralyzed. We hear constantly about the bystander effect — the silence that allows discrimination to flourish. But there is a vital counter-narrative written every day by individuals who actively choose to confront hate and stand in solidarity with targeted communities.

Welcome to the Upstander’s Playbook. To understand how we can all become agents of positive change, we gathered diverse strategies from 28 individuals on the front lines of dismantling antisemitism, racism, and bigotry.

Dismantling hate is a daily practice. It requires dedicated commitment to education, a willingness to listen, and the courage to act, even when it feels uncomfortable. Whether you are confronting prejudice at the family dinner table or advocating for equitable policies in your workplace, the upstander’s journey is both demanding and deeply rewarding.

Ready to discover the simple, consistent habits that can profoundly impact your community? Let’s dive in.

A.D. Nauman, Educator and award-winning author

A.D. Nauman is an educator, award-winning author of Scorch and Down the Steep, and dedicates her life to social justice. Her fiction investigates the sociopolitical in the personal, especially the impact of culture on identity, the mechanisms of power in personal relationships, and the challenges of life in a hyper-capitalist society.

1. Show kindness every day to everyone: be a role model of kindness. Send out those ripples. If we help to create a culture of kindness, I think, angry people will be a little less angry in their daily lives.

2. Make a commitment to honesty, and share that commitment with everyone in your sphere. Again, be a role model. Consciously avoid exaggeration. Resist the impulse to spin reality to support some preconceived belief you don’t want to let go of. Resist the ubiquitous message that you must “sell” yourself: you aren’t a “brand” — you’re a complex human being, just like everyone else. Be open and honest about who you are, even if you fear it may make you look bad. Above all, admit when you make a mistake, apologize, and strive to do better in the future. Our culture is in a major crisis of honesty. If everyone were more honest, maybe the truth would not be so hard to discern.

3. Share stories about when you were wrong about someone because you judged them based on their appearance — including skin color, gender expression, ableness, religious apparel. Overgeneralizing doesn’t make us “smart”; in fact, overgeneralizing is a thought distortion. I once had a student who came to class in a full burka, face and body completely covered. The first night of class, I was sure she’d be quiet, oppressed, maybe even depressed. Yet she was among the most outgoing and cheerful of students, her personality shining through. She did a presentation on the Middle East’s many female heads of state. This was before the first woman to ever run for US president on a major-party ticket — in 2016 — was beaten by a far less-qualified renowned misogynist.

4. Challenge common cultural myths whenever you spot the opportunity. Be a model of critical thinking. One of our most tenacious myths is that poor people are poor because they’re lazy. I like to point out that a single mom who works two jobs and then comes home to take care of her children seems to be working much harder than men who waddle around a golf course all day. Another common myth is that rich men are just smarter than everyone else. But that’s not true either: they may be better at making money than everyone else, but that doesn’t mean they’re smarter; it just means they value money more than other people. There are scores of brilliant people in this country who choose other professions — teaching, medicine, research, etc. The myth that rich people “deserve” their wealth because they’re somehow “better” than lower income people is deadly. Literally.

5. Talk with the people in your sphere about the importance of voting, especially (though not limited to) in the upcoming presidential election. Voting in this election is in truly a matter of life and death. Do we want a president likely to start a war, like George W. Bush? Do we want a president who blocks all attempts to help people get affordable health care? Who we elect as president matters — the policies and priorities that he (or someday she, maybe) advances will impact our daily lives. Again, look for myths to bust: it is not true that the two political parties are the same, nor is it true that “all politicians are crooked.” These are myths created to dissuade people from voting.

In discussions of voting, raise the issue of how one decides which candidate to support. Try emphasizing that selecting a candidate is like conducting a job interview. In any presidential election, we’re hiring someone to lead our country. The candidates are job applicants: which one do you think will do a better job, and why? When someone says we need a “smart businessman” to be president, please point out that a successful CEO does not necessarily have the skill set to lead a democracy. CEOs can bark orders, and employees do what they’re told for fear of being fired. A US president doesn’t do that. He must work with people he dislikes to get things done. Our country is not a company. Another not-very-good reason to vote for someone is that we just “like” him better. This is going to be the leader of the free world, not your bowling buddy. Once I read a letter to the editor from a man who was supporting John Mc Cain because he thought Sarah Palin was “very attractive.” Dude, this is not someone you’re going to date! A vice president is someone who may have to run the country! So what do we look for in job candidates? Experience and sanity would be high on my list.

Janet Singer Applefield, Clinical Social Worker

Janet Singer Applefield is a child survivor of the Holocaust and a clinical social worker who has spent over 40 years speaking with students, educators, religious groups, and government officials to raise awareness and understanding of the dangers of prejudice while encouraging audiences to stand up to any kind of discrimination and injustice. She is also the author of the memoir, Becoming Janet: Finding Myself in the Holocaust.

1. BE KIND. Befriend the newcomer. When I arrived in this country in 1947, the teacher referred to me as “the little foreign girl.” I felt marginalized and inferior. Luckily, a small group of girls befriended me. To this day, I’m still friends with many of them.

2. COURAGE. Speak up when you witness an injustice. While I was in New York City I visited a Polish butcher shop. I overheard the counterman say, “Hiter’s work wasn’t done.” I shrunk in fear and I was at a loss for words. I have learned that when I have been silent, I feel terrible about myself. Be brave and speak up.

3. EMPATHY. Always try to put yourself in the other person’s place — understand their position. Don’t pre-judge. When I worked in a state psychiatric hospital in 1981, the medical director was a German-born psychiatrist. I wanted to find out what he and his family did during WWII. He admitted to me that he was in the Hitler Youth and that his brother was killed in combat. After he emigrated to the US, he experienced tremendous prejudice. I felt empathy for him and was pleased that I could feel another human being’s pain.

4. OPEN-MINDEDNESS. When I meet someone, whose position is contrary to mine, I ask questions to understand where the person’s views are coming from. I educate myself and broaden my perspective. At the same time, I don’t alienate or insult the other person.

5. BE WELL-INFORMED: Read, travel, and keep learning about the unfamiliar.

Douglas Isaac Busch, The Genos Center Foundation

Douglas Isaac Busch is a world-renowned American photographer, inventor, teacher, artist, gemologist, philanthropist, and architectural designer known for using large portable view cameras to create large photographic contact prints. In 2023, he announced The Genos Center Foundation, a multicultural exhibition hall, art gallery, non-denominational chapel, sunken gardens, and sustainable reflective water gardens focused on eradicating genocides worldwide.

1. Stand up for those who can’t defend themselves.

2. Stand up for those that may be different than you or have a different plight because we are stronger together and smarter together.

3. Open your heart, your compassion, your ears, and your knowledge towards strangers or people struggling. Art, whether music or visual, helps to open our hearts.

4. Don’t just speak about it, but speak about how you can make an impact. Speaking with people and educating them without insulting them.

5. Remember that your voice is needed, has value, and has reach, why not use that for good?

Tal-Or Cohen Montemayor, Founder and executive director of CyberWell

Tal-Or Cohen Montemayor is the founder and executive director of CyberWell, an international nonprofit organization focused on combatting the growing wave of online antisemitism and Jew hatred being spread through social media. The organization uniquely works with leading social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram to identify and remove antisemitic content.

1. Intervene for your fellow person as if you saw a distant relative being bullied, harassed or harmed. This comes from a basic Biblical concept of “Love thy neighbor as thyself,” (Leviticus 19:18) which has evolved into the modern saying, “Treat others the way you would like to be treated.” Many people think of that in the affirmative of positive treatment and being polite, but it also means standing up for one another and offering each other basic protection and care much like you would a relative.

2. The benefits for being an upstander almost always outweigh the risks. Worst case scenario — you get told it’s none of your business and to pipe down. Best case scenario — you save a life. In that scenario even if the girl or guy would tell me it was none of my business, so what? No harm done. Momentary awkwardness and embarrassment I can live with any day. Finding out that I was in a situation and could have prevented a catastrophe but didn’t? I couldn’t live with that.

3. Need courage? Check if others are seeing what you are seeing and if they also feel uncomfortable with what’s going on. A big reason I intervened that night on the street was because my husband heard me wonder aloud to myself and actively encouraged me to intervene. I knew he was also going to be my back up if anything did get out of hand.

4. Act quickly — even small interventions go a long way. Even if you don’t feel like being a hero at the moment or are scared to call attention to yourself, any small intervention to ask a potential victim if they are okay, acknowledge vocally that you see what’s going, encourage others to witness what is happening with you or going to get help from an ally or authority figure — all of these active steps interrupt the cycle of harassment, bullying, racism or victimization and generate accountability, take the momentum out the escalating situation and allow the person being targeted to get clarity, support and, hopefully, to get out of the situation.

5. Be aware of other people who are less fortunate, less empowered or more marginalized around you.

Tamara Friedman and Kira Ayla, Co-Founders of It’s OVER. End Discrimination NOW.

Tamara Friedman and Kira Ayla are the co-founders of It’s OVER. End Discrimination NOW., a powerful movement committed to fostering an inclusive and respectful world where everyone can flourish, regardless of background. This mother-daughter duo endeavors to end discrimination and inequality, recognizing them as abuse that strips individuals of their power and self-identity.

1. If you are witnessing someone being bullied and/or discriminated against in any way, speak up for them.

Kira Ayla: When I was at my locker at school gathering books for my next class, a bully shouted out an awful name to me. One of my peers witnessed this and spoke up for me. I’ll never forget her kindness.

2. Similar to no. 1, if you see that someone is being bullied on social media, you can be the commenter who speaks out on their behalf. We have seen many commenters speak up for people receiving hate comments on various social media platforms.

3. Create a hashtag or phrase on social media that allows people, including yourself, to speak out against these injustices and/or, if you feel comfortable, tell your story about your personal experience(s) with these injustices as well.

4. If you witness someone being bullied, abused, and/or discriminated against or if someone is close enough to you to tell you what happened, let that person know you are there to help in any way they need.

Kira Ayla: I had a friend who was there for me when I had just endured the trauma of discrimination. In tears, when I told her what happened, she told me she would help me in any way I would need. She did everything possible to help me get through that awful trauma.

5. If you are witnessing someone being a target of abuse and/or hate on social media by another account, be the one to report that account.

Paula Kweskin, founder/director of the women’s rights non-profit, The 49%

Paula Kweskin is a human rights lawyer, filmmaker, and founder/director of The 49%. After October 7th, she joined forces with Muslim friends and colleagues to create a grassroots initiative called The Collective, a group of Muslim and Jewish women committed to ending extremism, antisemitism, and hatred in all its forms.

1. When you feel that queasiness in your stomach, or that ache in your heart, knowing that something is wrong — don’t ignore it! Do anything you can to stand up for what you know is right.

2. Educate yourself on complex issues. Go deep and then deeper on issues that concern you or you might have questions about. Don’t just learn the facts from Instagram or Twitter; take a trip to the library and read a (very long!) book on the topic. Read an article by someone you don’t agree with; read newspapers that might not fit your political preference. Challenge yourself at every turn.

3. Find a mentor who you trust and whose work you admire. What can you glean from this individual?

4. Join a community of like-minded people who care about similar issues so that you don’t feel that you’re on your own. Or, if you can’t find a community which already exists, start reaching out to friends and colleagues to see if you can start your own group.

5. Make small shifts, no matter what. If you’re in conversation with someone who makes a joke that is bigoted, don’t just “let it go.” See if you can find ways to stand your ground as an Upstander.

Rabbi David Lerner, Spiritual leader of Congregation B’nai Sholom-Beth David

Rabbi David Lerner is the spiritual leader of Congregation B’nai Sholom-Beth David in Rockville Centre, NY. He has been actively involved in community engagement around the troubling upsurge in antisemitism that has emerged over the past few years, engaging both community members and local elected leadership.

1. Be engaged with your community. Forge relationships with your neighbors and with local officials.

2. When you see something out in public that you know is wrong, say something. When you see a friend say something on social media that you know is wrong, say something. Don’t feel like you are only one person and therefore that your voice doesn’t have that big of an impact. When you feel some way, it’s likely that others feel that way too and when we give voice to our concerns, it gives others the permission to do this, too. As difficult as it may be, sometimes we have to challenge the voices that are the loudest in our society if we feel that what they are saying is wrong.

3. Educate yourself. Don’t share facts without confirming them. Don’t just rely on people from marginalized communities to speak out.

4. Try to forge relationships with people even when they feel differently than you do. Learn to engage in civil dialogue and try to understand the values underlying different beliefs.

5. It’s taught in Jewish tradition that the impulse for good is quicker acting than the impulse for bad. What this means is that we know what is right. When we know internally what the right thing to do is, we should just do it and let the chips fall where they may.

Eric Farbman, Supreme Master (International President) of Alpha Epsilon Pi

Eric Farbman is the Supreme Master (International President) of Alpha Epsilon Pi, the world’s leading Jewish college fraternity with chapters on more than 150 campuses in the United States, Canada and Israel. Eric is the president of Organize My People, a strategy consulting, technology implementation and software development firm focused on helping organizations utilize technology to drive their missions.

1. Be Strong — We can’t let the intimidation tactics work. We encourage our members to wear their AEPi letters proudly and to represent themselves as members of the Jewish community in the manner that they want to. No one should be afraid to wear a kippah or a Star of David.

2. Advocate — It would be easier for all of us to lock ourselves in our homes and just hope that this latest period of antisemitism goes away. We can’t do that. We need to go to public forums and set the record straight about Israel and the Jewish community. Last spring, our chapter house at the University of Arizona was vandalized days before the City Council was set to vote on a so-called ceasefire resolution. Rather than being intimidated, several of our students showed up at City Council and spoke against the resolution, which did not pass!

3. Build For the Future — We also can’t succumb to the tyranny of the moment. The Jewish community has been around for thousands of years, and we will be here for many more millennia. Yes, we need to respond to what’s happening outside our doors, but we also need to invest in our future. Just reminding our students that they have this commitment to the future of the Jewish people through the Jewish Youth Promise is a critical first step to that.

4. Do Good. — AEPi’s CEO recently wrote an article where he praised our students for their ongoing commitment to Tikkun Olam. He said that we needed to play a role in healing an imperfect world. I love that sentiment and am proud of our members for continuing to do that. Just last month, our students raised more than $60,000 for Jewish and Israeli causes through our annual Mensch Madness philanthropy program. Imagine that. With all of the hate our students are experiencing and instead of descending into hatred, they went out and raised money to help others, to help strangers. To me, that is the best illustration of Tikkun Olam.

5. Celebrate the Good Things. — I need to remind myself that there are lots of good things happening all around us. Despite what is happening on campus, AEPi is having an excellent year. We reached a major milestone when our 10,000th undergraduate signed the Jewish Youth Promise. I’m so proud of what our members are doing, and I want to make sure that more people are aware of the good and not fixated on the bad. Finally for me, I try to focus on the joy that my family brings me. My young sons — future AEPi brothers — amaze me every day, as does the support I get from my wife and extended family. We all need to find those important and good things and remind ourselves of them every day.

Douglas Wellman, Author

Douglas Wellman is the author of A Teenage Girl in Auschwitz: Basha Freilich and the Will to Live. He is a former Hollywood television producer-director and assistant dean of the School of Cinematic Arts at the University of Southern California.

1. You don’t have to start at the bottom and work your way to the top. That’s not necessarily a bad approach, since when you get to the top, if you get to the top, at least you know the nuts and bolts of how your industry works. The other side of the equation is that if you start at an entry-level position, say, production assistant in my media career, those above you may always view you as a production assistant, like you never grew up. Change companies. However, it is far better, in my mind, to analyze your business, come up with an intelligent plan to make something better, and get it to the person in charge. You may get nowhere, which is quite likely, but you have shown yourself to be a creative, thinking individual. Creative, thinking individuals are always in demand. Being outstanding at the bottom is the best way I know to shortcut the trip to the top.

2. It’s not always about you. People who are pushing toward a goal want someone who can push with them, not be off on a tangent. Good ideas and energy that contribute to the goal are generally welcomed and rewarded. Ideas that favor the individual may be viewed as self-serving and draw more suspicion than praise. If you don’t like the goal of your organization, change organizations.

3. Be careful with the way you communicate. Be clear and precise when presenting ideas to leaders. What you say and what others hear may be two different things. This also applies to casual conversation. Know the personality of the people with whom you work. I am a jokester at heart. I had a very good job at a studio and would frequently make jokes in the presence of the vice president. For a long time, I was unaware that the man had absolutely no sense of humor. He looked at me with great curiosity occasionally, and that should have been a clue. I found out later that he took many of my humorous statements as personal insults. That was not at all the case. Unfortunately, I didn’t find out until he fired me.

4. Not everyone with a smiling face is your friend. One of my smiling assistants at my very good studio job was frequently present during my joke telling or mini-comedy performances. He knew they were jokes. He knew the vice president had no sense of humor. He knew he wanted my job. What I didn’t know until years later is that he was going to the vice president with statements like “Why do you let Doug insult you like that?” and “I could do Doug’s job for less pay.” Then this same person would come back into our office with a smile and ask if he could help me. When I finally found out the whole story years later, I decided not to confront him. I felt that since I obviously had not been paying attention to what was going on around me, I probably deserved what I got. I chalked it up to a learning experience and got on with life.

5. If there are people in your life who care about you, be sensitive enough to take the time to openly care back. Don’t assume they know you care. This was a big problem for me, and sometimes still is. Many times, I was completely wrapped up in my work, which left me totally unprepared and sometimes confused, when personal relationships disintegrated. That one took a while to learn.

Ann Arnold, Co-Founder Mark Schonwetter Holocaust Education Foundation

Ann Arnold co-founded The Mark Schonwetter Holocaust Education Foundation in late 2019 in honor of her father and is the CFO of H. Arnold Wood Turning, Inc. and the Chief Strategy Officer of BIG (Buyers Intelligence Group).

1. Smile — When you smile at those you meet, you are welcoming.

2. Be kind — Kindness can go a long way; you never know if the person you are interacting with may need a kind word to help them get through the day.

3. Always be open to learning new things — You never know what you may learn and what that will teach you about others. Like my example above, learning how people perceive white people taught me something new and gave me a deeper understanding of perceptions.

4. Silence is complacency, and you never know how that will affect you later. When we went back to Poland in 2009 for the cemetery ceremony, we met people that remembered my father and aunt. They had lived across the street from them and had played with them as kids. They started to recount stories of how the Nazi’s treated the Jews, and how they were threatened if they helped the Jews. It was almost like they were purging themselves of this guilt they had carried around. I tell students this story all the time, and then I bring it back to them. I try to bring it to their level. Think about bullying. There are three sides: the one being bullied, the one doing the bullying and then the vast majority that do and say nothing. How will that affect them later? What will they think in 20 years when they run into that kid that was being bullied and they did nothing? How will it affect them if one day they have a child that becomes the one being bullied?

5. Call your friend that is being affected by the current event and check on them, even if you personally are not being affected. I cannot tell you how many of my Jewish friends are in shock about the deafening silence they are getting from their non-Jewish friends with all that is going on in this country today. But when a non-Jewish friend reaches out to just check in, say hi, check to see how you are doing, it means the world. People feel alone in this world sometimes, and they just need to know that someone cares.

David Machlis, Associate Professor of Finance and Economics, Adelphi University

Associate Professor of Finance and Economics David Machlis, PhD, is a respected and innovative producer and educator in all aspects of his professional life. In the classroom, his non-traditional and creative techniques garnered him Adelphi University’s Teaching Excellence Award.

1. It is important as an upstander to take risks. The Liberators Program is definitely an example of risk-taking. How would one, in a short period of time, find liberators? To many, the risk of failure would discourage one from creating this vital program.

2. To be an upstander one must be a creative thinker. I received a call from a renowned Holocaust scholar, representing a major museum, as to my reaching-out to El Al Israel Airlines and obtaining a free ticket for Justice Gabriel Bach, the Deputy Prosecutor of Eichmann, for his trip to the United States. The caller, aware that the March of the Living deals with El Al, thought, incorrectly, that I was the contact. The next day, I responded that, if necessary, I would pay for Justice Bach’s ticket if I could have one night with Justice Bach on his visit to the United States. This took place in 2017 when Justice Bach, a former Supreme Court Justice for 15 years, was the last living prosecutor of the famous trial. It turned out that Justice Bach couldn’t make the trip but this resulted in my connecting and developing a warm relationship with him.

On my future trips to Israel, I had the honor of meeting Justice Bach in his Jerusalem home and in December 2018, the March of the Living, together with Rutgers University, had a major historic program, to an overflow audience, in a Jerusalem theater. Attorneys viewing the program online were able to earn continuing legal education credits.

3. A successful upstander will be skilled in developing well-connected synergistic partnerships. In 1993, the leadership of the International March of the Living accepted my suggestion that it is essential that the program goes way beyond just enrolling Jewish high school students for participating in the annual trips to Poland commemorating Yom Ha Shoah, Holocaust Remembrance Day.

I recommended at a June 1993 meeting, bringing state Commissioners of Education and heads of state Boards of Education to the 1994 March of the Living Program. Why this recommendation? I had read that in California, in history textbooks, the Holocaust was a footnote and that in a survey of high school students, 60% were not aware of the Holocaust. Bringing these important education decision-makers on a five-day immersive educational experience would, hopefully, change their attitudes as to what is taught in their schools. The trip began with a full-day seminar in Washington, D. C. with a visit to the U. S. Holocaust Memorial Museum before departing for Warsaw, Poland

My persuasive presentation motivated the leaders of the March to commit to funding the program. That was, of course, just the start. How does one in a short period of time locate these important people and motivate them to participate in the program? I had never met a State Commissioner of Education (the Chief Educator of the State).

I was fortunate that within a few months I developed a partnership with the National Association of State Boards of Education, whose incoming President was a hidden child and the Council of Chief State School Officers (CCSSO). In November 1993, I was invited to make a presentation at the annual CCSSO Conference in Columbus, Ohio. The synergistic partnership was developed that day, and this was the first group of influential decision-maker participants on the March of the Living.

4. To be successful as an upstander one must cultivate relationships with people from very diverse backgrounds.

Approximately 25 years ago, I developed a relationship with an Evangelical Christian group that was based in Oswiecim, Poland, the city where Auschwitz was located. I had met the head of the Ministry and learned of their dedication to providing food and medical care to needy survivors in Poland and nearby countries.

To me, it was extremely meaningful and inspiring that these Polish Christians, based in the vicinity of the Auschwitz death camp, would be committed to improving the quality of life of survivors of the Holocaust. I developed a strong bond with these upstanders and facilitated their participation in the annual March of the Living program.

In January 2006, when I organized the visit of Oprah and Professor Wiesel to Auschwitz, there was approximately four inches of snow on the infamous train tracks at the entrance to the Birkenau death camp. How would Oprah’s camera crew film the tracks? A phone call to my Evangelical Christian friends/partners was the solution. They brought a group of their followers to shovel the snow off the tracks!

The same Evangelical Christians, in 2022, were involved in arranging busloads of people that were desperately exiting Ukraine in the early stages of the war and provided them food and shelter in Oswiecim. When I asked them to bring 12 Ukrainians to lead the 2022 March, they, of course, responded instantly. RELATIONSHIPS are crucial in succeeding as an upstander.

5. An upstander must not be afraid to fail.

In 1998, I suggested to the March of the Living leadership that we develop a program earmarked for college students from very diverse backgrounds. Up until this time, non-Jewish students had not participated in the March. A major question was why would students from very diverse backgrounds participate in the March and would we be able to generate substantial funds to provide generous scholarships to the participants?

I believe a statement in the March of Remembrance and Hope brochure (name of the new program) describes why the program was successful in partnering with colleges, universities, and groups globally in generating substantial scholarship funds:

“The March of Remembrance and Hope is a dynamic educational leadership program. Its purpose is to teach students of different religious and ethnic backgrounds about the dangers of intolerance through the study of the Holocaust, and to promote better relations among people of diverse cultures.”

“The March of Remembrance and Hope bring together in Poland hundreds of college and university students in order to demonstrate the horrors of the Holocaust and the necessity of each of us doing our part to create a world in which religious and ethnic diversity are cause for celebration rather than discrimination.”

The colleges and universities participating in the program had a faculty member preparing the cohort of students for the program the semester prior to the trip. In the inaugural program, approximately 400 students from several dozen colleges participated in the program.

Prior to flying to Poland, a 24-hour seminar was held at a Newark, New Jersey, airport hotel with educator sessions led by top scholars and educators who accompanied the participants on the educational mission. The success of the program was apparent at that seminar as it was most inspiring to see the beautiful blending of students from very diverse backgrounds. Anecdotally, 20 of the approximate 400 participants opted for Kosher food, of which the majority were Muslim students.

Hadara Ishak, President & Chief Operating Officer, Jewish Future Promise

Hadara Ishak is the President & Chief Operating Officer at Jewish Future Promise. Before joining Jewish Future Promise, she had a career in both the for-profit and not-for-profit worlds, including as an entrepreneur building Jan Micolle into a successful women’s clothing manufacturing company.

1. Educate yourself on the issues via a reputable source: Take the time to learn about historical and current issues affecting marginalized communities, including antisemitism. For example, read books, attend lectures, or watch documentaries from credible sources to deepen your understanding.

2. Speak with your Jewish friends about their experiences: Engage in meaningful conversations with Jewish friends and acquaintances to gain insights into their experiences, challenges, and perspectives. This fosters empathy and helps build stronger bonds within diverse communities.

3. Stamp out hate when you see it: Don’t stay silent in the face of hate speech or discriminatory actions. Speak up and take action to challenge and confront bigotry whenever and wherever you encounter it. For instance, if you witness antisemitic remarks, address them directly and educate others about their harmful impact.

4. Voice your opinion to public representatives: Advocate for policies and initiatives that promote inclusivity, tolerance, and the protection of marginalized groups. Contact your elected officials, attend town hall meetings, and participate in grassroots advocacy efforts to make your voice heard on important issues.

5. Be empathetic: Cultivate empathy and compassion towards others, especially those who may be targets of hate or discrimination. Put yourself in their shoes, listen actively, and offer support and solidarity. For example, show empathy towards victims of hate crimes and support initiatives that promote diversity and inclusion in your community.

Ashley Bendiksen, Top Youth Speaker

Ashley Bendiksen is an acclaimed national speaker, Top Youth Speaker®, and award-winning activist, specializing in domestic violence, teen dating violence, and sexual assault prevention. She educates, empowers, and equips audiences with the tools to drive change through her keynotes and presentations at schools, major conferences, and corporate audiences.

1. Don’t be silent. Every one of us is a bystander. We witness positive and negative things constantly and make a choice whether to speak up or not. Upstanders can make a difference by speaking up. If you overhear or see something problematic, call it out. This can be as simple as saying, “Hey, stop. That’s not okay,” or asking someone, “Hey, are you alright? What just happened to you isn’t okay.”

2. Do something. Let’s face it — not all of us are great at speaking up. Some of us are just conflict-averse and want to avoid communication at all costs. Still, you can do something. Perhaps you observe harm occurring and find someone else to intervene that is more vocal or holds a position of authority. You can also get creative to prevent harm. For example, let’s say your friend’s partner is berating them, break up the situation by asking them to go find the bathroom with you, help you find your keys, go grab a bite, etc.

3. Educate yourself. Part of being an upstander is being educated and knowledgeable about the struggles of others and the problems in our world, and challenging our own biases, too. Knowledge leads to greater empathy, which then leads to a greater sense of moral responsibility to act. By learning from survivors, for example, we can better understand the complexities of abuse, the barriers to leaving, and why it’s important that we do something when we see it. We can also relate to others better when we hear their stories, barriers, and learn as much as we can.

4. Join a larger movement. Being an upstander also means contributing towards tangible change. This can include volunteering, participating in rallies and awareness campaigns, supporting relevant nonprofits, or even joining a board of directors, coalition, or special task force. Not only can you make (and begin to see) a real impact by participating firsthand, but you also join a community of individuals with a passion for change. It’s inspiring and motivating, supports innovation, and builds real momentum. It’s also one way that you can serve as an ally for marginalized communities. This is as simple as looking up local or state nonprofit organizations, community groups, or coalitions, sending an email, and asking how you can help.

5. Support systemic change. It’s important that we exercise our right to vote and ensure that we align our votes with the values we seek. This means supporting candidates and policies that recognize and promote systemic change, while also calling out individuals and policies that don’t. We can also use our voices to challenge discrimination, hold institutions accountable, and speak out against policies and practices that perpetuate inequity and harm. Additionally, anyone can get involved in policy reform — joining advocacy efforts, lobbying for policy change, or testifying before legislators. All of this is another function of being a bystander, and it’s instrumental in the effort towards change.

Mike Gutter, Author of Never Again Still Means Never Again

Mike Gutter, author of Never Again Still Means Never Again, was raised in a close-knit Jewish community in Columbus, Ohio, and developed strong values and lifelong friendships rooted in his heritage. After co-founding one of the largest recycling companies in the U.S., he transitioned to writing, driven by a desire to address critical social issues.

1. Be Knowledgeable. Know some facts before judging anyone. I’m not referring to “facts” you think you may hear while drinking at a bar. As you start to gain knowledge and that knowledge supports or reinforces your argument, you can slowly start making your way to the first level of being an Upstander.

2. Open Your Mind. It goes without saying. You know by now I don’t care if I support your beliefs or not; you should always, I repeat always, have an open mind. I enjoy talking to someone who, just by conversation, makes me smarter. Also, it keeps you from hate. I have a million comments, facts, and questions for every Palestinian protester who was on every campus in this country that I know they couldn’t answer, but a lot of them didn’t care or didn’t want to hear them. For me, there’s nothing worse than talking to someone who is close-minded. Don’t be that person.

3. Passion. You can’t be an Upstander if you aren’t passionate about it. Passion for me encompasses education, responsibility, excitement, knowledge, learning, etc., etc., etc. Nothing will turn you from an Upstander to a Bystander quicker than no passion.

4. Clear Directive. What is your commitment? Do you know exactly what you stand for and why you stand for it? Your passion must be organized and clear. Now, things may change and you can change with it, but when things are wrong and others try and change it, you must be resolute if you know it’s wrong.

5. Fun. Obviously, a situation will dictate if something turns ugly, but in general, most people in the U. S. are friendly and just want to go on with their lives. I don’t care who you are, what you believe, and where you’re from, but if you don’t add some fun, you may still be an Upstander, but you’ll probably be an ass too. Numbers 1 through 4 that I answered will quickly go away without mixing in some fun.

Mike Teichberg, American Jewish Committee (AJC)

Mike Teichberg was born and raised in Puerto Rico of Cuban and American Jewish roots. He is an award-winning former head of Human Resources who switched to a career in Jewish advocacy and philanthropy, and is also an award-winning poet and creator of an AI collaboration concept album.

1. Speak Up — When you see something online or out in the world, call it out. We are living in an era where the comments sections and keyboard warriors weigh in on unimportant news items and virtue signaling stories. They post, but in person, most people don’t speak up.

2. Show Up — Make the time in your personal and professional life to attend community events. Live by the ‘be a friend to get a friend’ mantra. Person-to-person relations will always have a bigger impact than interacting behind screens. Most people don’t know people or interact with other communities outside their own.

3. Support Online — Use your networks and platforms to spotlight stories from marginalized communities. Retweet, repost, and reference them in your circles. Elevating others ensures that the fight against hate isn’t one-sided.

4. Volunteer — Join a nonprofit board for a cause near and dear to you. The days of big-dollar donations to sit on boards are loosening. At AJC, community members can serve on advocacy and event committees without being a full board member. No minimum giving required to get involved.

5. Follow your passions — For me, as a music lover but not an instrumentalist or singer, I had been limited to writing poetry to share my big ideas. With the recent AI chatbot releases, it is now possible to create fully produced music with full vocals and musical arrangements via simple text prompts. I am incredibly proud to share that I will be releasing a concept album later in the Fall on all major streaming platforms, in addition to my previous albums.

Aaron Wertheimer, Marketing Reel

Aaron Wertheimer currently works as a copywriter for Marketing Reel. He believes arts and culture have the power to transform the world for the better, which is why he currently volunteers as a dance/music instructor and community organizer with inclusive organizations such as Studio D, Dayenu, and Limmud North America.

1. Leave space for others’ concerns- had I not been at that Shabbat dinner table and listened to my friend about his qualms about our world, I would not have been in a position to connect him to our marketing agency and help those in college have access to better mental health resources.

2. Listen more- Sometimes, all it takes to change a person’s life is to know that they’re being heard. When someone feels uncomfortable or is projecting hate, it’s often from a place of fear, pride, pain, or deep emotional hurt. Sometimes, a simple, “I hear and feel you,” is often all that a person is looking for, and they might open up as a result. Whether as a copywriter on the job crafting the right content for someone, or bridging the divide between people of different faiths, I’ve found that providing a listening ear goes a long way in combating hate and promoting mutual respect.

3. Be curious: ask questions of clarification- I can’t tell you how many times repeating back what I heard and asking for clarification has helped me better understand the needs of others. When you’re listening and asking questions, you’re more likely to understand the motives another person has if you ask them what’s on your mind (respectfully, of course). If they’re someone who promotes hate, you’ll immediately be able to tell, and you’ll be able to act accordingly to combat it — usually with additional clarification questions. People love to mirror each other’s behaviors. The more you ask questions, the more you’ll help reflect what you’re hearing, and you increase your chances of having them hear you out as well.

4. Act on your feelings and intuition- if after asking for clarification something doesn’t sound right, and the person still perpetuates hateful acts of discrimination, take action. Listen to your feelings and intuition, and know deep down that if you feel angry, sad, grief-stricken, frustrated, or fearful, take those feelings and act on them. Your feelings exist for a reason: use them for good. Stand up to hatred, bigotry, antisemitism, and racism by listening to your inner compass.

5. Reflect, think before speaking, and then speak- everyone has an opinion, which is why it’s important to reflect on and think about what you want to say before saying it. I remember a time when I was at another Shabbat dinner, and I was speaking to a friend of mine who identifies as Muslim. At the time, we were talking about how the Quran differs from the Torah. He mentioned that he wasn’t sure about his beliefs towards Jews and Muslims, which I took to mean that he didn’t think they deserved equal treatment. When I heard that my friend wasn’t sure, I started pointing out left and right how Jews and Muslims deserve equal treatment. After he pointed out that I misunderstood him, that what he meant was that he’s still coming to terms with his family’s beliefs about Jews and Muslims and his personal beliefs, I realized I shouldn’t have interrupted him and gone on a mighty tirade against the tyranny of small-mindedness.

Fortunately, we’re still friends today. However, I learned a valuable lesson from this experience: reflect on what someone else says, think before speaking, and only then speak. I try to practice this daily, but like all people, I make mistakes (a lot of mistakes). As a bystander, it’s important to reflect on what others say before speaking, just to ensure you’re not allowing your own biases to cloud your perception of their words and actions.

Whitney A. White, Co-Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Equity Commons

Whitney A. White is Co-Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Equity Commons, a company that integrates the latest cross-disciplinary research with cutting-edge Virtual Reality technology to reduce implicit bias. For over a decade, Whitney served as CEO of Afara Global, an innovation firm.

1. Acknowledge the reality that all of us have implicit bias, and let that realization compel you to take action. You have probably had racist, bigoted, or hateful thoughts before, and that does not make you a bad person. Even if you are extremely measured in your words and actions, it is still very likely that you have implicit bias. Once you reckon with that, it can help you open your mind to education and growth in ways that might not have been possible before.

2. Start reading and consuming content that will help you understand the issues and how you can show up to your role as an Upstander. So You Want to Talk about Race by Ijeoma Oluo is a good example of a book about race in the contemporary United States, but there are countless great choices out there.

3. Be willing to have difficult conversations when you hear hate, bigotry, or bias come up. It does not have to be a dramatic confrontation — simply asking the question, “what did you mean by that?” is a non-threatening way to start a dialogue and open people’s minds and hearts to greater empathy.

4. Get to know people who have experienced hate or bias firsthand. That means talking to more Black people if you are white, talking to more transgender people if you are cisgender, or talking to more economically disadvantaged people if you are well-off. Developing these relationships will help you grow your understanding of not only how bias impacts the day-to-day lives of those different from you, but also how you can be an Upstander in your daily life.

5. Join a network of other Upstanders. This could be a community service group, an advocacy initiative, a volunteer organization, a nonprofit, a support network, or a discussion group. Ask friends for recommendations, take a look at your social media, and do some Google searching. Having a network of like-minded peers on the journey to be Upstanders will help you stay motivated and connected to your goals and your community.

Dr. Nikia Dennis, Ed.D., Crown Vizion Apparel

Dr. Nikia Dennis is a dedicated healthcare leader with over a decade of experience, a new entrepreneur, and holds a Doctor of Education degree. Her commitment to improving healthcare systems and health equity has been the cornerstone of her career.

1. Look outside of your life bubble at the oppressions of others. Some of us like myself may not be personally affected by immigration but people who are searching for a better life for themselves and their families are being separated, abused, imprisoned and killed. Sometimes we need to look at situations and think how I would want my family to be treated if we were in that situation. How would I feel if my children were taken from me in a foreign country and I didn’t know if I would ever see them again. It can be easier to empathize when you can look at things from a personal perspective.

2. Be a voice for those who are unheard. There are a lot of people in prison who have done egregious things and should face punishment but, where do we draw the line on treating them like human beings? What about non-violent offenders, innocent people or even those who made one bad decision? Should they all live in unsanitary conditions, suffer abuse, receive poor medical care and little to no mental health assistance? We need to remember that we are all one bad decision away from changing the rest of our lives and how would we want others to speak up for us if we were in that situation.

3. Do not be intimidated by the size of the problem. Our healthcare system is broken and many of the people who need it the most do not have access to the care they need. Addressing the fee-for-pay structure, health insurance costs, and even foundationally biased medical schools can seem intimidating but, if we all do a small part, we can start to make things better. Opening more primary care clinics in underserved neighborhoods, educating people on health literacy, and helping more minorities go to medical school can go a long way.

4. Address hate speech and discrimination firmly and promptly. Do not allow people to think that this behavior is okay whether it is a personal or professional setting. It does not need to be confrontational but show them that you will not allow those actions in your presence.

5. Always educate others, even the ones fighting against you. Use every opportunity to educate others on how their words, actions and beliefs are hurtful, wrong and damaging. When most people know better, they do better so anytime you are faced with ignorance use that as an opportunity to educate.

Kevin L. Reichling, Author of Bullying and Society: A Personal Story

He is a former victim of chronic bullying and is a valuable eyewitness to some of the worst aspects of human behavior, with all of it being directly connected to racism and bigotry. It is his hope that parents, teachers, and activists will read his book, learn from it, and find ways of intervening on behalf of victims and society before they are permanently affected.

1. Lift weights! I went to school with a lot of budding young racists. They have a mental image of non-racists as skinny weaklings, unable to win barfights. That mental image will need to be changed. I was treated with more respect when I grew bigger.

2. Organize yourselves! You will need strength in numbers, political organizations, and the ability to launch boycotts. Finding allies among the labor unions will also be necessary. In politics, non-violent tactics are the most effective.

3. Intervene! Once you have strength in numbers, intervening on behalf of someone being harassed or attacked in the streets will become easier. This is where bodybuilding comes in handy, and these situations may require the use of force. A bigger, stronger person is more likely to get a bully to back down without having to throw a single punch. Once, I stood up for a bullied kid, and the bullying jock backed down, despite the fact that he was still a little bigger than me. The extra twenty pounds of muscle I gained was the difference between him backing down and laughing at me.

4. Educate the young! It is often useless to try to change an older person’s mind. It is best to involve college students who are away from their parents for the first time. People do not begin to question their upbringing until they are in their twenties. If you can organize students, you’ll have another tool at your disposal.

5. Vote! None of this will amount to anything if we can’t get the bums out! Enough said!

Paul Ferrante, Author

Paul Ferrante is a retired career secondary school teacher and athletic coach, as well as the author of 11 books ranging in age from young adult to adult with subjects varying from sports to the paranormal to civil rights. He is dedicated to promoting diversity and inclusion through his writing, inspired by his experiences teaching and coaching in diverse environments.

1. Speak up. If you see an injustice, make that known to the powers-that-be.

2. Encourage free speech through books instead of banning them.

3. Make a conscious effort to try to learn mor about people who are unlike you. For me, this came through my years of teaching in radically different places.

4. Try to help, even in the smallest way, those you encounter who are the subject of cultural/ethnic/ religious/racial bias.

5. Stand by your convictions and don’t back away from them.

Lillee Jean, Actress from New York City

Lillee Jean is an actress from New York City, known for her Hollywood celebrity talk show Lillee Jean TALKS! Live, and the productions she directed, produced, and wrote including, her breakout short film Miss Roxie and her newest in-production project The Trapper Trap — Part 1.

1. Think of things positively! You have the power to be a leader in a subject with just your positive input.

2. Don’t just say something, walk the walk. Know the facts, and be able to speak confidently, because you know it’s the truth.

3. Don’t push someone, or pressure them into doing something. People naturally through actions can see who you are, and what impact you have.

4. Connect with other people in a community with positive outreach programs to uplift one another.

5. Don’t give into hate. Unless a response is needed to stand your ground on a serious subject, walk away.

Nadia Kamies, Founder of An Archive of the Ordinary

Nadia was born in Cape Town and worked with children as an occupational therapist, yoga teacher and aromatherapist before turning her focus to writing and storytelling as a way of healing the past. She is the founder of An Archive of the Ordinary, a living repository of cultural heritage comprising stories prompted by tangible objects.

1. Believe anything is possible. Growing up in South Africa during the 1970s and 1980s it was difficult to believe that we would ever have free elections or that Nelson Mandela would be president in my lifetime. But the possibility gave us hope and inspired us to work towards change.

2. Educate yourself about the history and culture of the people who don’t look like you, think like you, pray like you, or speak like you do and be prepared to stand up for them too. I have been trying to learn to speak isi Xhosa, a language widely spoken in South Africa, for the longest time. It is difficult but the very act of trying has taught me so much about a different culture to mine.

3. Play to your own strengths and get involved at the level that is comfortable for you but don’t be afraid to move out of your comfort zone. I thought that I could write a book and that would be enough to start a conversation. Turns out that people still want you to talk about it even if you are an introvert and the very idea of standing up in front of strangers strikes fear into your heart! And so, even if I lose sleep the night before, I show up.

4. Don’t be afraid to admit you don’t know and be open to learning new ways of solving a problem. I returned to university aged 50 because I felt that I needed to equip myself with new skills to carry on my work — not everyone needs to do that, but it opened new opportunities for me that have helped me to grow and be more impactful.

5. Know and understand your community and gather in solidarity with others who have similar goals. It will sustain you when the going gets tough. I have found that a music concert, a meal or even sitting down to stitch in a circle of women has buoyed me up when I most needed it. If you spend time with people who share your passion and goals, there will be at least one who can offer encouragement.

Jorge Arteaga, VP of Movement Building at Right To Be

Jorge Arteaga is the VP of Movement Building at Right To Be, where he leads efforts to advance the organization’s mission of ending hate and harassment in all its forms and creating a world filled with humanity through education, advocacy, and community organizing. With a deep commitment to social justice, he strives to empower people, communities, and organizations with the tools to create safer, more inclusive environments for all.

1. Distract- Create a distraction to deescalate a situation. The idea is to give the person experiencing the harm a way out. You can walk up to the person experiencing the harm and ask them an unrelated question. In a public setting, you can walk up to them and say, “Hey, I’m lost. Can you help me?” or “Hey, do you know what time it is?” or even act as if you knew them, “Hey, how have you been? I haven’t seen you in a while.”

2. Delegate- Find someone to help. Chances are someone wants to help in the situation and doesn’t know how. So here you simply want to ask and tell them how they can help. In a public space, you can look at the person next to you and say something like, “Hey, do you see what’s going on, I don’t feel comfortable intervening can you say something?” Or you might go to someone who is an authority in the space, like a store manager, waiter, or bus driver and ask them for help. Always check in with the person experiencing the harm and ask them if they want you to call the police. Sometimes, calling the police can make the situation worse. If you feel that danger is imminent, however, use your best judgement.

3. Document- Create documentation of the situation and then give it to the person experiencing the harm. Often times the burden of proof is left on the person who experienced the harm so you can pull out your phone and record the situation or even write down what you see and then give to the person so they can choose if they want to report it or not. Most importantly, make sure someone is already helping this person, like finding help or intervening before you start recording what you see.

4. Delay- Check in with the person after the situation has passed. Sometimes, the harm can happen so quickly that we don’t even get a chance to intervene at the moment, but we can still check in on the person to make sure they’re ok. Research we did on the over 32,000 stories we’ve collected shows that as little as a knowing glance greatly reduces the trauma people experience after a situation of hate or harassment. Ask them, “Are you ok? Can I help you in some way?” or “I saw what happened, and I’m sorry, that wasn’t ok, and you don’t deserve that.”

5. Direct- Set a clear boundary and then care for the person experiencing the harm. You directly address the person causing the harm and say something like, “They seem uncomfortable. You should give them some space” or “What you said was completely inappropriate or racist or antisemitic. Its not ok, and you should stop talking to them and give them some space.” The idea is to set a clear boundary and then turn to the person to ensure they’re ok. Do not further engage the person causing the harm once you’ve stated the boundary to avoid escalating the situation. Only use Direct if you feel safe doing so.

Abe Gurko

Abe Gurko moved from New York City to Hollywood to work behind the scenes in the entertainment industry, developing his skills working with Carrie Fisher. Before finishing his debut memoir, Abe spent decades producing high-profile events and is currently in production on two documentaries.

1. Take off your clothes and look in the mirror and what do you see and where do you see that needs improving so rather than what you can do for others what can you do about yourself to make you a kinder person.

2. Call someone you have a foot forward you might not get a response as a matter but it’s the action what action are you taking.

3. See if there is a group that you can at least sign up for to get emails just to kind of know what’s out there.

4. Make a post about just saying I don’t know anything about anything to be honest that nobody knows anything nobody knows anything words I live by.

5. Pet your dog

Bradley Caro Cook Ed.D., Career Up Now

Bradley Caro Cook Ed.D. is the executive director of Career Up Now and creator of MediateHate.ai. He is a seasoned social entrepreneur and Jewish educator from Atlanta, Georgia.

1. Learn: Know the history and facts.

2. Speak: Use your voice against wrongs.

3. Act: Engage in meaningful actions.

4. Support: Help those targeted by hate.

5. Lead: Set an example for others.

Chris Devins, Chris Devins Creative

Chris Devins is a Chicago-based Urban Planner/Artist known for large, outdoor murals that portray south side Chicagoans in a positive light and fights antisemitism, racism, bigotry and hate with Public Art. He founded his multi-disciplinary practice, Chris Devins Creative officially in Bronzeville, Chicago in 2014.

1. Attend workshops and protests that focus on race related issues.

2. Study, shore up your personal knowledge of the issues. Check for your own biases and assumptions.

3. Support the work and Art of people of color and those of Jewish descent.

4. Become involved in organizations that support racial justice causes.

5. Use your particular talents and skills to add to the conversation in positive ways, counteract the negative.

Samuel Fisher, Founder at Neon Moon Media

Samuel Fisher is the founder and driving force behind Neon Moon Media, a platform dedicated to fostering understanding and combating hate in all its forms. Leveraging a background in sociology and community outreach, Samuel has dedicated his life to being an Upstander, using education and dialogue to bridge gaps and foster understanding.

1. Educate oneself about the diverse cultures and communities around them.

2. Speak out against hate when you witness it.

3. Foster safe spaces for open dialogue.

4. Support victims of hate and discrimination.

5. Collaborate with organizations working against hate to amplify their efforts.