“There is no right or wrong; there are just those who keep going and those who stop.”
Ava Paloma’s biggest break arrived at midnight, with almost no warning.
She had gone to Georgia during the pandemic to work in a production office, not to star in a movie. The cast gathered for a read-through the night before filming, but the actress playing the lead role was missing. A production manager encouraged Paloma to read for the part. The next day, when another opportunity arose to step in, she volunteered. The original actress ultimately contracted COVID, and the production turned to Paloma, who had already shown the team what she could do.
“They called me at midnight the night before filming and said, ‘You have to get ready to act tomorrow,’” she remembers. “I was ready.”
The movie was Deadlock, the 2021 action thriller starring Bruce Willis, and the role became Paloma’s most significant professional leap to that point. The circumstances were unusual, but the moment fits the larger pattern of her career. Paloma’s story has not followed a neat progression from childhood ambition to uninterrupted success. It has been marked by pauses, self-doubt, unexpected openings, and repeated decisions to step forward before certainty arrives.
The desire to perform came early. As a preschooler, Paloma played Mrs. Claus in a Christmas pageant. She remembers having perhaps one line, but she also remembers making the audience laugh. “I loved that feeling,” she says. Holiday pageants became theater, and by 13 she had found a local agent and submitted to The Talent Group in Pittsburgh, an agency she says she remains with today. Summers at French Woods in upstate New York placed her among other young theater kids, and performance became less a novelty than a way of changing the atmosphere around her.
“I love shifting the energy in a room,” she says, whether that means making people laugh or moving them with dramatic material.
Yet the instinct to perform did not protect her from being hard on herself. At around 18, after a drama program rejected her, Paloma auditioned through Backstage and landed the role of Emilia in a production of Othello. The director was Robert Eggers, then, as she remembers it, another teenager mounting Shakespeare in the East Village. Rather than experiencing the role as proof that she belonged, Paloma felt overwhelmed by the material and concluded that she had taken on more than she could handle.
She stepped away from acting during her twenties.
Years later, seeing Eggers build a major directing career changed the way she understood that period. The lesson was not that she had failed to recognize an important connection. It was that she had judged herself too harshly while everyone involved was still learning. “There is no right or wrong,” she says now. “There are just those who keep going and those who stop.”
Eventually, she chose to keep going. A small role on the original Gossip Girl helped rekindle her commitment. She returned to training, studying with Bill Esper at the William Esper Studio, and began rebuilding her acting career. Progress came gradually until Deadlock compressed years of preparation into one improbable night.
That willingness to seize an opening now coexists with a different kind of discipline. Paloma is navigating an acting career while raising a young child, and the demands of those two roles have changed the way she measures a successful day. While filming Razor’s Edge, she brought her 18-month-old son to set for the first time. Her husband cared for him while she worked, and Paloma remembers functioning through a week without a full night’s sleep.
“I wasn’t bright-eyed and bushy-tailed,” she says. “I was a working mom.”
On set, every minute mattered. She wanted to arrive prepared, treat people well, do the work, and then get back to her family. The experience sharpened a tension that runs through the way Paloma now talks about ambition. She still wants the next role and the next project, but she does not describe professional success as something that should consume the rest of a life.
Her practical habits reflect that restraint. Each morning, she tries to organize the day around three priorities: one for her son, one for acting, and one personal or household task. A playground visit, an audition tape, groceries. It is a deliberately small system for a profession built around enormous uncertainty.
Paloma brings the same practicality to what she calls her “5 P’s”: punctuality, positivity, preparedness, being polished, and professionalism. They are not glamorous principles, which may be the point. Her career has taught her that talent operates inside a larger ecosystem of crews, schedules, reputations, relationships, and repeated encounters. “Your reputation is everything,” she says.
At the time of our conversation, Paloma was awaiting the release of Razor’s Edge and could say only limited things about work she had filmed for A24 and Netflix. She and her husband were also developing projects together, including a psychological thriller he wrote.
But when asked what idea she would most want to spread, Paloma did not talk about the entertainment industry at all. She returned instead to family, neighbors, children, and the people directly in front of us. In a culture that rewards the appearance of influence at scale, she argues for something smaller and harder to measure: “Investing deeply in your core community and family relationships is the most impactful thing anyone can do.”
For someone who first fell in love with acting because she could change the energy in a room, it is a fitting definition of influence. The room has simply become more important than the audience outside it.
Yitzi: Ava, it’s so great to meet you. Before we dive in and talk about your amazing work, our readers would love to learn about your personal origin story. Can you share with us a story of your childhood, how you grew up, and particularly the seeds and genesis of all the amazing creativity that has come since then?
Ava: Absolutely. I had the acting bug at a very young age. I was Mrs. Claus in my preschool Christmas pageant, and I probably had one line, even if Mrs. Claus sounds like a big role — they give everybody a chance. I just remember making the audience laugh, and I loved that feeling. From then on, anytime there was a holiday pageant, I tried to be part of it. As I got older, I continued doing theater.
I found a local agent when I was 13 and submitted to The Talent Group in Pittsburgh, an agency that I’m still with today. I went to summer camp at French Woods in upstate New York, where a lot of theater kids ended up going. Performing has always been something I enjoy doing. I love shifting the energy in a room, making people laugh, or making people cry when the material is dramatic; that is impactful too. But laughter is definitely a bit more enjoyable than sadness.
Yitzi: Please tell us about the next chapter — your first breaks and how you entered the entertainment scene.
Ava: I took a break in my 20s because I felt like I needed to figure some things out. Eventually, I decided to get back into it. This was a while ago: I ended up randomly landing a line on the original Gossip Girl, and I thought, “Oh my God, I really need to jump back into this. I’m ready.”
So I went back to school, studied with Bill Esper at the William Esper Studio, and jumped right back in. For a few years, things started to pick up slowly, but during COVID my biggest breakthrough was booking Deadlock, an action film starring Bruce Willis that we shot down in Georgia.
It happened unexpectedly. During the pandemic, I went down to Georgia just to work in production in the office. The night before production began, we held a read-through with all the cast, but the actress playing the lead role was missing. The production manager got a bit tipsy and told me, “You need to read for that role. You need to go for it.” I bolstered my courage and thought, “Maybe I will.”
The next day, the production manager didn’t even show up to the read-through, but it gave me the confidence to step forward and say, “I’ll read that part since the actress isn’t here.” That actress ended up contracting COVID, and through a turn of events, the team said, “Well, Ava did a great job at the read-through, and she’s an actress — she was just working in production because of the crazy COVID circumstances. Let’s put her in.”
They called me at midnight the night before filming and said, “You have to get ready to act tomorrow.” I was ready. It was thrilling and exciting, and I felt like I was born ready for that moment. That was my biggest leap, and since then, I’ve continued working on great projects.
Yitzi: There’s a saying that sometimes our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Do you have a story about a funny mistake you made when starting out and the lesson you took away from it?
Ava: That’s a good question; it’s a deep one.
In my early 20s, as I mentioned, I took a bit of a break. To give some context: I had auditioned through Backstage and booked the role of Emilia in a production of Othello. It was a very young cast, and the director was a young Robert Eggers, who has gone on to direct major Hollywood films. Back then, he was just an 18-year-old kid producing shows in the East Village.
We were all around 18 years old, and something about the experience made me feel overwhelmed — like I had bitten off more than I could chew with Shakespeare — and I was simply too hard on myself. So I took a break from acting in my 20s.
A few years later, I saw that Rob was directing major blockbusters, and I thought, “No way! I did a play with him when we were practically kids.” I had been so overly critical of myself, yet he just kept building and creating. Looking back, the play was actually very good for an 18-year-old staging Othello in the East Village.
My takeaway regarding mistakes being our greatest teachers is to never be too hard on yourself when you’re young. Young people face so much pressure, and I was definitely guilty of being overly self-critical. Just go for it. You’re going to mess up, but pick yourself back up and keep going. There is no right or wrong; there are just those who keep going and those who stop.
Yitzi: There’s a related concept that hearing “no” is simply redirection rather than rejection. Do you have a story where receiving a “no” for an opportunity led to an even better one?
Ava: Subtly, this happens all the time — even this morning when our sitter didn’t show up, we adjusted our schedule, and things worked out.
Looking back to my early days applying to schools and colleges, I received some rejections. Leading up to that Othello production, a drama program had turned me down. To bolster my confidence, I went out to audition, determined to book a Shakespeare role and prove that I could do it. I booked the part. Even though I was hard on myself afterward, that rejection directly led me to work with a brilliant, up-and-coming director. It proved to me that I was on the right path, and that initial “no” led to bigger and better growth.
Yitzi: What has been the most challenging project or role you’ve taken on so far, and why?
Ava: The upcoming Razor’s Edge project was probably one of the most challenging because it was the first time I was juggling motherhood — I had an 18-month-old at the time — with the rigorous demands of being on set.
My husband and I handled it beautifully, but it was the first time I brought my son to set. I hadn’t had a full night of sleep all week, so I wasn’t bright-eyed and bushy-tailed; I was a working mom. Every minute on set while he was with my husband, I knew I had to stay laser-focused, do my work, greet everyone warmly, and make the most of the shoot before rushing right back to my son. Balancing those two responsibilities simultaneously made it one of my toughest roles to date.
Yitzi: Please tell us about the exciting new projects you’re working on now and what you hope to work on in the near future. Feel free to be as elaborate as you like.
Ava: Razor’s Edge is coming out soon; there isn’t a fixed release date yet, but I’m very excited for it. I also shot a project earlier this year in May for A24. I can’t say too much about it yet, but I’m eager for its release. Additionally, I have a role in a Netflix film scheduled for late fall or early winter.
Looking ahead, my husband and I have several projects in development. There is one script he wrote that I’m thrilled to get off the ground, whether I act in it or help produce. It’s a psychological thriller that leans slightly into the horror genre, and we’re looking forward to sharing it with the world.
Yitzi: This is our signature question. Ava, you’ve been blessed with notable success and learned a lot from your experiences. Looking back to the beginning of your acting career, can you share five things you’ve learned over the years — perhaps the hard way — that someone starting out today can benefit from?
Ava: I actually call these my “5 P’s”:
- Punctuality: It sounds basic, but always aim to be ten minutes early. Arriving exactly on the minute can easily turn into being late. Show up on time, be prepared, and never keep the crew waiting.
- Positivity: Bring your best self. Avoid complaining and never engage in set gossip. Unless a serious issue must be addressed, avoid speaking negatively about anyone. Bring energy, be kind, and be easy to work with — it lifts the entire room on long production days.
- Preparedness: Know your lines, know your character, and learn as much as possible about your fellow cast and crew. Thorough preparation ensures the production runs smoothly and demonstrates your dedication.
- Polished: Someone once advised me, “Dress for the role you want, not the role you have.” If you want to be a series regular, carry yourself and dress like a series regular from the moment you enter the room. If you want to lead a company, dress like the leader. Intentional presentation carries real weight.
- Professionalism: When you practice the first four principles, professionalism naturally follows. In an interconnected industry where professional circles are tight, your reputation is everything. Protect it, nurture it, and ensure it reflects your integrity.
Yitzi: That’s beautiful. Can you share some of the self-care routines you practice to help your body, mind, and heart thrive?
Ava: Sleep is essential for me; being well-rested resolves so many issues, prevents unnecessary conflict, and improves mood. People often say, “Sleep when the baby sleeps,” which can feel unrealistic when you have a mountain of chores, but adequate rest makes your waking hours significantly more productive.
Hydration is another daily essential. Drinking plenty of water makes a noticeable difference whenever you feel sluggish or get a headache.
In the morning, I keep my routine simple to prevent feeling overwhelmed by acting and motherhood. I try to wake up slightly before my son does and organize my day around three core priorities: one for my son, one for my acting career, and one personal or household task. For example, taking Beau to the playground, filming an audition tape, and running to the grocery store. Focusing on three clear tasks keeps my day manageable and gives me a genuine sense of accomplishment.
Yitzi: This is our final aspirational question. Because of your work and platform, you have significant influence. If you could spread an idea or inspire a movement that brings the greatest amount of good to the most people, what would that be?
Ava: Focus on the people closest to you — your family, your children, your neighbors, and the people you interact with daily. Those relationships matter most. In a culture driven by social media where people try to influence global audiences, it’s easy to overlook your immediate neighbors or miss quality time with your children. Investing deeply in your core community and family relationships is the most impactful thing anyone can do.
Yitzi: How can our readers continue to follow your work, watch your upcoming projects, and support you?
Ava: My Instagram handle is @apaloma, which is where I’m most active. Balancing motherhood with auditions takes up most of my time, so that is my primary platform. Please feel free to reach out there; I’m an open book and love connecting with people.
Yitzi: It has been a joy speaking with you. I wish continued success and good health to you, your husband, and Bo. I hope we can do this again next year.
Ava: Thank you so much, Yitzi. I really appreciate it, and thank you for having me.
Yitzi: The pleasure is mine, Ava. Thanks so much. Bye-bye.
From a Midnight Casting Emergency to Co-Starring With Bruce Willis: Ava Paloma’s Unorthodox Rise was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.