“Take some time through your day, and put down your phone, now right now, go into your camera, disconnect those filter options… The way to accept ourselves, grown from our insecurities if to accept who we truly are, battle scars and all.”
We had the pleasure of talking with Sarah Hinkes. Born and raised in Chicago, Sarah Hinkes spent her summers traveling to London, England, and now resides in the Lincoln Square neighborhood. A versatile professional, Sarah’s career spans technology sales, substitute teaching in Chicago Public Schools, acting, and writing. Her diverse background reflects her passion for creativity, connection, and community.
Outside of work, Sarah is deeply committed to bringing people together. She founded the Wine Book Club (WBC) 2.5 years ago, creating a monthly space where friends nourish and empower one another while enjoying books, conversation, and community. Family is central to her life — especially the meals and memories shared with her mother and sisters. Writing has also been a meaningful outlet, offering a healthy escape and a way to explore life’s complexities.
Guided by integrity, authenticity, and her personal mantra, “It’s better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission,” Sarah approaches life and work with boldness, knowing that taking risks often earns respect and fosters growth.
As Founder of Sparks Dating, Sarah created a modern dating experience designed to foster authentic, in-person connections. Sparks Dating hosts curated events where singles deck their phones at the door, set aside distractions, and engage in meaningful, face-to-face conversations. The company’s philosophy is simple: in a world dominated by apps and digital communication, real sparks happen when people connect authentically, without filters, pretense, or social media. By encouraging participants to show up as their true selves, Sparks Dating helps people rediscover genuine chemistry and meaningful human connection.
Thank you so much for your time! I know that you are a very busy person. Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us your “Origin Story”? Can you tell us the story of how you grew up?
Born and raised in Chicago, with the exception of spending summer holidays away in London. My father passed away very early on, so my mum raised my sisters and I. She gave us a wonderful childhood full of imagination, wonder, and love.
Can you tell us a bit about what you do professionally, and what brought you to this specific career path?
Currently I am the founder of my company Sparks Dating. This journey started over a decade ago when I started to pay close attention to dating apps and the people around me that were serial dating looking for their match. I noticed how the dating app “swipe right, swipe left” would perpetuate that of a user’s dating experience. If you have a bad date, ok date or even a great date but what else is out there, the app was ready when you are to swipe your next “pick”. Whatever happened to organically meeting someone, taking time to get to know him or her, go through a few bad apples to find your one? I quickly saw that dating apps promised the here and now but somehow with algorithms, and filtered options, this promise would at times mislead you and others and start a relationship off on quite literally a lie. Sparks Dating is simple is an invitation to valet your phones, and meet in real time to authentically be you and with that notion, you may just meet your Spark.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
- Crazy- I am not certifiable, I don’t think…I am someone who has a simple idea that in over 20 years no one has thought of, in order to implement it and challenge a massive competitive market, I have to be willing to go the extra mile.
- Tenacious- In order to get my idea some juice, I had to pitch it to VCs, stock brokers, angel funds etc, and I did not give up until I met someone that believed in me as much as I believed in myself.
- Fearless- To have the calm, resolve, passion, and sanity to build a business from the ground up.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?
This next phase I am inviting restaurant groups big and small to collaborate their dining experience with Sparks Dating and host a monthly Sparks Up. If you are a restaurant group in the Chicago area interested in an elevated, organic, splash of ingenuity this fall, please reach out. The experience itself my diners love the idea of letting go from there day to day for just a few hours to make an honest memorable connection without any distractions.
For the benefit of our readers, can you briefly tell our readers why you are an authority on the topic of dating and finding love?
I don’t pretend to be a SME on this, I am someone by choice who has been single for over a decade. I have close friends and family members who are constantly relying on the next dating app or dating match maker to find the one. I live by a simple philosophy that I feel explains how Sparks Dating understands meeting your true Spark. “Just rember the person you wake up too (yourself) is the spark within. The right person you partner with will ignite that spark, and you will grow your flame together. The best way to explain what I am is to first explain what I am not.
I am not a mum- unless teaching my students in the Chicago public schools as a substitute counts.
I am not a quitter- I have found that if you believe in something with your mind, body, and soul, you will make it happen, if it’s not meant to be it will fall off, but you, yourself will not.
I am not afraid, I have had life experiences with health, open heart surgery for an aortic aneurysm, I got through it with the love and support of my family and friends, books, and a vision that I would give back some day and help this world love a bit more.
Based on your experience, what is a common root cause of the “inability to find love”?
I do believe that you and yourself have to take accountability when ready for a partner. If you are not in a healthy place in your life with friends, family (your own and the ones you choose), community how can you expect to meet someone who also inhabits these qualities? We all have stuff, past regrets, relationships that rightfully have us questioning if love is even worth it? I believe that you love yourself, and more importantly forgive yourself, then you are ready to love.
What are some common misconceptions or myths about finding love in the modern world, and how can they be debunked?
I hear so often how people “change” themselves for there partner. It could be their hair, clothing, friends, hobbies, time with our without family. Remember He or She fell in love with you as you are if he or she insists on these changes, this is not true love. Walk away, and know that the “Spark” for you is waiting for your truly confident, and authentic self to walk into his or her life.
Let’s explore how the rise of social media and dating apps has impacted the way individuals approach and experience dating and relationships. Can you share a few dos and don’ts?
Do’s:
- Be Intentional, not Addicted
- Show up Authentically as You
- Use your actual mirror, friend for advice etc.
Dont’s:
- Do not count those swipes and likes as connection
- Do not ghost, if you take the time as someone would to meet you how would you feel?
- Do not equate your self worth with algorithms
What are your thoughts about the challenges and opportunities that come with workplace romances?
Honestly I see more opportunities because you let someone see you at your best and quite possibly your worst. Hanging out my a coffee cooler venting about this project and if he or she takes notice, that’s a great way to nourish a spark. Challenges- unfortunately not all is fair in love and war in the workplace, if a true romance develops be mindful of HR guidelines but honestly I see much more upside here.
Can you discuss the role of vulnerability and authenticity in forming meaningful connections and finding lasting love?
All of us have lived through some time of trauma associated with love, either from personal experience or someone we know. This can without a doubt leave use questioning our own self worth, if love is even out there for us, and why if it is, where is He or She? When you meet with someone from the start armed with your baggage, but also your armor now intact, it will open up a world for you that let’s love it. Organic love will recognize that in one another and sharing those vulnerabilities with the right Spark will ignite that flame to be even brighter.
What are five things people need to navigate modern love?
- A Smile
- Kindness
- Honesty
- A willing to laugh with and be laughed at
- Accountability
If you could start a movement, what would it be?
Take some time through your day, and put down your phone, now right now, go into your camera, disconnect those filter options… The way to accept ourselves, grown from our insecurities if to accept who we truly are, battle scars and all.
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
Sarah Hinkes of Sparks Dating On How To Navigate Our Complicated Modern World To Find Love was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.