Social Impact Authors: How & Why Author Dr Harry Cohen of Be The Sun, Not The Salt Is Helping To Change Our World
Leadership is a skill as well as a responsibility. It is the ability to inspire and motivate people to think and act in ways they would not ordinarily do without the leader’s support, guidance, and vision. A leader is a person who brings out the best in others. Anytime someone says, “Let us go this way,” and people go that way, that, is leadership.
As part of my series about “authors who are making an important social impact”, I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Harry Cohen.
Dr. Harry Cohen Ph.D. is a Psychologist, Executive Coach, Restauranter, and the Author of Be The Sun, Not The Salt. In 2015 Dr. Harry gave a TEDX Talk that outlined the concept of Heliotropic Leadership (the scientific understanding that all living systems are drawn towards life-sustaining energy including our own). The principles discussed in the TEDX Talk were so well received, that Dr. Harry was inspired to write his latest book, Be The Sun, Not The Salt (1/1/18), which is a short straightforward yet profound guide for being your best self, uplifting others, and behaving in a manner that draws others toward you and makes you happier and more effective. It’s not the type of book that is merely read once and placed on the shelf but rather revisited throughout our day and life as a source of guidance, and an uplifting reminder of what positive behavior looks like for individuals of any age. bethesunnotthesalt.com
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series! Before we dive into the main focus of our interview, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
I was born into a middle-class family in Buffalo, New York. I have two older siblings, both sisters. My mother graduated college with a degree in psychology. My father also graduated college and ran the family soda business started by his father and uncle. I went to Cornell to become a doctor. I took all pre-med classes but organic chemistry weeded me out. I took a year off and worked in a facility for developmentally disabled adults for a year and then went back to school and finished my undergraduate psychology degree to pursue a graduate degree to become a Psychologist.
When you were younger, was there a book that you read that inspired you to take action or changed your life? Can you share a story about that?
In high school as part of my final senior year project I lived in an Ashram and read books about ancient Eastern philosophy, Siddhartha and Be Here Now were standouts. In college the standouts were How to Know God, and Mans Search for Meaning; In graduate school: Seven Habits of highly Effective People and the Biology of Hope. All of them created for me a clear direction for my life, to become an enlightened human being.
It has been said that our mistakes can be our greatest teachers. Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?
While in graduate school I was teaching corporate training classes such “effective listening” and “time management.” One time, I showed up at 9:00am at a corporate conference room to teach a “time management” class that started at 8:00am. Everyone was there waiting for me. Of the many lessons that experience taught me are 1. Know when you’re supposed to be somewhere and get there early. 2. You are going to screw up, so forgive yourself and move on. 3. Do what you love, and don’t take gigs that you’re not really passionate about.
Can you describe how you aim to make a significant social impact with your book?
I want millions of people to deliberately practice what it means Be the Sun, Not the Salt.
Can you share with us the most interesting story that you shared in your book?
The most interesting story is the forward written by one of my mentors. What this woman wrote made me weep when I first read it. “I thought, those many years ago, that we were hiring a corporate shrink, and I guess that’s how it started out. But what I have now is a treasured friend and confidant to whom I trust the full of my trepidations and my joys. His wisdom has made me a better leader and a better person. Read on, take action, and he can do that for you, too”
What was the “aha moment” or series of events that made you decide to bring your message to the greater world? Can you share a story about that?
While giving a toast at a friend’s 60th birthday party, a 60 Minutes producer was in attendance. He thought I would make a good speaker for the Tedx conference his daughter was in charge of at her University. My Tedx talk ended with the call to action, “Leave people with an afterglow, not an aftertaste, Be the Sun, Not the Salt.” It was only after that talk that I decided, “This is it. I want to bring this idea to the world.” A marketing executive colleague heard me speak and told me she was floored by the simplicity and power of the message and wanted to help spread the idea.
Without sharing specific names, can you tell us a story about a particular individual who was impacted or helped by your cause?
A CEO changed the way he runs his meetings and bought copies for all of his employees and customers. A third-grade teacher read a chapter from the book every single morning for an entire year with her students. A cancer survivor used the book during her chemotherapy treatments and gave copies of the book to her care team.
Are there three things the community/society/politicians can do to help you address the root of the problem you are trying to solve?
Before people speak if they could ask themselves if what they’re about to say has any shred of negativity. If it does, remove the negativity and still make the point. Politicians and others have a hard time with this idea since it is customary to go negative. They do not need to do that. 2. When any of us makes a mistake, practice, model, and demonstrate making a direct apology accepting full responsibility for the mistake, period. 3. Imagine if people said explicitly that we are all a work in progress, each of us trying to get better in many ways, whether to be a better listener or better partner, or better citizen. “I am trying my best to be the sun, and not the salt.” “I am trying to be uplifting and helpful to others and not disrespectful, rude, uncivil or unconscious.”
How do you define “Leadership”? Can you explain what you mean or give an example?
Leadership is a skill as well as a responsibility. It is the ability to inspire and motivate people to think and act in ways they would not ordinarily do without the leader’s support, guidance, and vision. A leader is a person who brings out the best in others. Anytime someone says, “Let us go this way,” and people go that way, that, is leadership.
What are your “5 things I wish someone told me when I first started” and why? Please share a story or example for each.
Everything takes longer than you expect, be patient and persistent and do not give up on any goal. My PhD took ten years to complete. I am glad I did it. 2. Do not pass up opportunities to buy real estate that you can use or live in, even when you think you cannot afford it. I had an opportunity to buy the building that my restaurant is in. I didn’t. My rent is controlled by my landlord. I have two homes on the water because I followed that advice. 3. Every sacrifice of any kind is worth it, sacrifice more than you think. My 3 million miles on Delta, means I traveled for work a lot. It also means I have seen and done and have a lot. 4. Write down your vision and share it with people who will support you making that vision a reality. The only reason I achieved the things I have is because I write down my goals and share them with great supporters. 5. Develop lifelong habits that fuel your whole being including physical, spiritual, financial, emotional, and relationships. I am 69 and feel much younger. I have enough money to comfortably retire but I never want to. I am wealthy in friends, faith and family. All of my fulfillment is the result of harvesting the fruits from my lifelong good habits.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“People will forget what you did. They will forget what you said. But they will never forget how you made them feel,” by Maya Angelou. This quote summarizes the entire Be the Sun, Not the Salt philosophy. How we make people feel is my favorite organizing principle. It’s easy to remember, and easy to make people feel uplifted. In the tiniest ways we interact with people we cannot, NOT, make them feel SOMETHING. So why not make them feel something good? It seems so obvious and yet profound. We can also get better and better at it forever, and by doing so, our life and those we encounter are made slightly better as well.
Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would like to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them. 🙂
Mackenzie Scott donated 30 million dollars to the National Non-Profit, Friends of the Children. As the Board Chair of the Detroit Chapter, and a small philanthropist, I want her to know how much her example inspires me to give more. I would love to talk with her about how she might help other billionaire philanthropists to change the world for the better. Chapter One of Be the Sun, Not the Salt is “Do All the Good You Can.”
How can our readers further follow your work online?
This was very meaningful, thank you so much. We wish you only continued success on your great work!
Social Impact Authors: How & Why Author Dr Harry Cohen of Be The Sun, Not The Salt Is Helping To… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.